....my life changed.
it's been one year since my sister's passing. i can't believe it's already been one year. in anticipation of today, i thought about what to expect. would i just cry all day? are my parents going to be ok? should i go to the church event tonight and not think about it at all? talking to my mom yesterday to make plans, she didn't want to do anything. she didn't want me to bring it up to my dad to make him sad. i don't blame her. i've managed to avoid the area where she was found this whole time, even going to the cypress gym instead (although not often). i thought that it would be even more hard for my parents to remember that night when we couldn't find her, the police coming to our house to let us know that she was no longer with us. that was the hardest time in our family's life, to have someone so young taken away without any reason was really difficult to swallow. even now knowing that there is no answer to the question of what happened and how did she pass, there is still thankfulness in my heart; thankfulness for the time we had with her, for the Lord's grace in our family's life this past year through my extended family, church and friends, even my sister's friends. there is trust in the Lord knowing that He is sovereign over all, nothing is out of His control.
i'm thankful to spend time with my parents today. even though we didn't really talk about debbie, it was just nice to eat dinner, watch tv and laugh together. i wanted to visit long beach where we scattered her ashes, but couldn't due to the rain. hopefully the weather will get better so i can go next time.