2011 reflection

sorry it's been a while. i blame my new obsession - instagram (follow me: donas79), not really, just been quite busy with things.

let me start with some exciting news first. i FINALLY got a job! yes, after almost 3 years of unemployment (25 job interviews in 2011), someone decided to take a chance on me. i've been feeling so much like a charity case asking my parents for $ and having friends pay for me (thanks friends). i'm thankful to be working again. i just started this week and my first day at work felt like the first day of school - thinking about where i'm going to sit, who am i going to eat lunch with, making friends, etc. thankfully someone else started the same time as me so the attention isn't just on me. one thing that's been hard is going to bed early. i'm used to sleeping very late and waking up late. i've had to adjust my sleeping schedule so no more late night internet browsing and watching korean dramas. i made a list of things i wanted to do before i started work. that didn't work out too well...lots of things to cross off, but i 'm giving myself until the end of january to finish them all.

i'm truly thankful for 2011. it's been a hard year, but i'm really thankful that God has taught me to look to Him, to trust in His perfect timing. i'm looking forward to what God will do in 2012.

always double-check

i had a last minute interview today and while sitting in the waiting room, i looked down and saw that my zipper was not zipped. oops! i've done it a few times so i always double check when i use the restroom, but now i need to double check before i leave the house. i totally could have used this today:

link

scrapbooking

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travel map scrapbook - she also made one of thailand

love her digital scrapbook layouts

binder scrapbook journal

i have an unfinished scrapbook of pictures from 2007 that i should finish. i also wanted to scrapbook my dc trip in 2009 (pictures already printed out) that i never got around to. it's easier to just keep the pictures on my hard drive to look at since scrapbooking can be an expensive hobby. i rarely take pictures with my camera now since so many of my friends are like the paparazzi wanting to take pictures of everything and everyone. perhaps i might finish the scrapbooks, we'll see.

lists

i'm addicted to lists. i do everything according to lists, that's why i still write in a planner and work off of post-it notes when doing things throughout the day. it started at a young age. i remember making lists of books, toys, and even friends.  not much has changed. i have a list of books i own, musicals i've seen, tv shows i watch and want to watch, korean dramas i want to watch, movies to watch and movies i own, and sewing projects. i even make pro/con lists like rory gilmore when making decisions. i made a list of things to do in preparation for the weekend.

i came across this post that has some links to printable planners and checklists.

a few weeks ago, i made a list of 10 goals to accomplish within a week. for the first week, i only completed 2 things. after 3 weeks of the same list, there are still 6 things left to cross off.

perhaps next week i'll finish the list.

procrastination is my middle name

i have a paper due tomorrow and i'm sitting here at barnes & noble looking at design/decorating books and catching up on some blogs i follow. i'm a procrastinator. i'm not one of those who read ahead of schedule, but cram all my reading for the exam which happened 2 weeks ago. while perusing blogs, i came across this video and i think i need to do this. probably doesn't help sitting her at barnes & noble with so many distractions including my laptop and internet. oh well, back to my paper....

hit with reality...

i'm using the app myfitnesspal to keep track of my daily calorie intake and exercises. the app is a great way to see how much i'm eating and how many calories i'm burning from exercising.

so last week after my workout at the gym, i thought i would just grab something cheap for lunch. why not eat a delicious hot dog at costco for $1.50? i check myfitnesspal and the hot dog is 430 calories. wow! that's not even including the glob of ketchup i eat with my hot dog (i put A LOT). i went home disappointed and ended up eating at home (which was the better option anyways). at care group, janice brought porto's for snacks. i resisted the temptation to eat them since i already had dinner (only ate a small slice of fruit tart), but took home 2 potato balls to eat the next day for lunch. i checked the app and it was 440 calories for just 1 potato ball! OMG! i ended up eating one and then throwing the other one away (so sad).

i have a love/hate relationship with this app. some days i love it, some days i want to delete it. it's killing my mood and appetite. some days i just don't want to eat when i think about how much calories i would consume, but then i eat way less calories and start craving the dark chocolate frosting in the fridge.

i noticed that when i weigh myself at home, the scale shows that i haven't lost any weight so i checked my weight at the gym today thinking that my scale was off and that i was actually lighter since i've been watching what i eat and have been working out. i'm actually 5 lbs heavier than what i weighed on my scale. all this time, i've been thinking one thing and the whole time my scale was deceiving me. i'm going to have to up my gym visits from 3x to 5x a week. this week.

change in thought

it's been a month since my last post...and i thought i was going to post more often.

i was going to use this blog post to complain how i can't find a job and how much i'm frustrated with my situation, but a few sunday sermon ago was what my heart needed to hear. so instead of listing all my frustrations, i'm going to focus on the positives.

i'm thankful that i've been getting called for interviews. although i haven't been able to land a job yet, i'm glad that my skills/experiences are desirable enough to warrant an interview. i'm thankful that i was able to teach a few kids how to swim this summer (made enough to cover a few bills). i'm thankful for friends who want me to sew/alter things for them. i'm thankful for friends who pray for me (definitely a comfort and a need). i'm thankful to have my pride revealed to me. it's hard to accept help, let alone ask for help.

i read this hymn by samuel rodigast on girltalk this week which was a great comfort:

Whatever my God ordains is right,
Here shall my stand be taken;
Though sorrow, or need, or death be mine,
Yet I am not forsaken,
My Father’s care circles me there,
He holds me that I shall not fall,
And so to Him I leave it all.